Catastrophe Revealed?

Jeff Alberts's picture

Posted 11/21/2009 - 15:29 by Jeff Alberts

I'm sure everyone passing by here has heard of the recent CRU "hack" and release of email and data as reported at various blogs.

Some are over-reacting, in both directions, others are being prudently cautious, and yet others are trying to ignore it. A lot of questions remain to be answered, but what IS clear is that the emails appear to be legitimate.

Of course context is important, and I'm sure much of this is not taking that into account, or assuming a certain context. However, some of the more incriminating emails would be damning in any context.

What has been revealed is indeed a catastrophe, a catastrophe of elitist science and corruption of the peer-review process. At the very least, these "scientists" stand accused of hiding inconvenient results, gross hyperbole against other scientists, and probably outright fraud.

For what it's worth, I am willing to believe that CO2 might be a problem, but when we see incompetence and espionage such as these "scientists" have engaged in, it's difficult for me to take anything they say seriously ever again. They HAVE betrayed the public trust, and they don't seem to care. They have engaged in unethical practices made famous by "green" groups such as WWF, Greenpeace, Sierra Club, RAN, and others, by grossly overstating their case, manipulating results, and creating something that isn't there.

My hope out of all this, that one of the "elite" in these emails will step forward and tell the truth. But I'm not holding my breath.

Update: Just found this quote at the end of the "Rules of the Game" PDF included with the "hacked" file compilation:

“First they ignore you; then they laugh
at you; then they fight you; then you win.”
Mahatma Gandhi

I find this ironic in that this is exactly what's happening with the so-called "deniers". First they were ignored, then they were laughed at, now they're being fought. Is the outcome inevitable?

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The medical profession has

The medical profession has confirmed that a poison contained in a United Nations variant of fudge was the cause of a debilitating brain disease among scientists, now termed Climate Wars Syndrome (CWS).

The disease was secretly suspected by sceptical scientists to have spread rapaciously among the scientific community for two decades and to have taken a terrible grip over the reasoning powers of many. Victims can be identified by their green and alarmist complexion. Other side effects include an irrational hatred of mankind and a Tourette syndrome-like verbal abuse of anyone who uses fossil fuels. Threats of violence may occur. The world first learned of these sensational developments from the Internet on Friday November 20th 2009. The story broke that both the underlying cause of CWS and an effective treatment had been discovered by the due diligence of one man working at the UK’s Climate Research Unit (CRU). A vast community of Internet surfers soon memorialised these profound events by naming them, ‘Climategate.’

From leaked documents we understand that the catalyst for this epoch change in science occurred when a climatologist and self-taught computer programmer known only as ‘Harry’ was sat at his laboratory computer chewing on some fudge. Only after three long years working on this problem and in a sudden eureka moment, did it finally dawn on him. In Harry’s hands was the cause of brain fog mystery.

“F**k! It’s the fudge! It’s serial!” he cried.

Inadvertently, Harry has become the hero the public associate with solving one of the great mysteries of modern science. Since those findings have appeared on the Internet the world has quickly accepted that it was the UN’s foul fudge that caused scientists to suffer this dreadful disease.

Meanwhile, epidemiologists and clinicians have been quick to identify the hallucinagenic properties of the offending fudge to further unravel the mystery. Incredibly, the fudge has been found to contain a psychotropic substance that acts primarily upon the central nervous system where it alters brain function, resulting in changes in perception, mood, consciousness and behavior leading patients to feel delusions of grandeur and a sense of spiritual purpose in their lives.

It appears lone-wolf Harry, wiling away his time in the CRU laboratory subliminally faced the truth and by a process of ‘cognitive dissonance,’ shocked himself out of the effects of the psychotropic intoxicant, a drug now known to cause the hallucinogenic appearance of a mythical beast known as, ‘Man-Bear-Pig’ (MBP). Other experts who have replicated Harry’s experiments confirm the efficacy of the cognitive dissonance reasoning process as a cure. Apparently, most recovering ‘addicts’ (for this fudge-eating was clearly an addiction) soon notice a change starting with improvements in the appearance of their eyes which lose their tainted green colouration.

Other convalescing climatologists, that body of scientists identified as the worst fudge sufferers, are reporting the same side effects as Harry. Symptoms include anxiety, guilt, shame, anger, embarrassment, stress, and other negative emotional states that torment the patient. Epidemiologists have coined the name ’Climate War Syndrome’ (CWS) to describe the fudge-induced malady. Both ‘Climategate’ and ’Climate War Syndrome’ (CWS) have fast entered common usage giving a new handle on what was one of the great mysteries of our time.

Of course, like any serious disease, there will always be patients who won’t respond well to treatment. Those worst cases permeated with the deepest shade of green are believed to be James Hansen, Michael 'upside down' Mann and Phil Jones whom, its feared, may all need to be quarantined in isolation for several years.

Posted by johnosullivan on Tue, 12/01/2009 - 05:55
Rotfl! That's hilarious!

Rotfl! That's hilarious!

Posted by Jeff Alberts on Tue, 12/01/2009 - 20:44
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